I am really new at blogging so please bear with me and my writing. Thanks in advance for reading.
I was 26 years old living near Burbank California. I was an active single mom of a 2 year old girl. It was in March 1989 that I started feeling numbness in my feet. I ignored it because I was active and thought I had pinched a nerve. Well the numbness didn't go away, it started moving up my legs. So, I went to a chiropractor. After seeing him weekly for about 6 weeks, he asked me if I thought I was getting better, I said "no, I think I'm getting worse" he agreed. He asked me if there was any history of MS in my family. I told him I didn't think so since I didn't know what that was. He advised me to see my medical doctor soon. So the next day I called and made an appointment with my doctor and saw her the following week. My doctor thought the problem may be my thyroid so they took some blood and I went home.
The next week I went to lunch with my new boss. We went to a Mexican restaurant and we each had a single margarita. We ate and drank and talked for a little over an hour. When we got up to leave my legs would not hold me, I couldn't walk. I had heels on so I took them off thinking that may help, it helped a little but not much. My boss went to get the car and I managed to hang on to enough things to get myself out of the restaurant. When I got in the car she asked me what I wanted her to do, take me to the hospital or to my doctor or what? I told her to go back to the office, that I should be fine by the time we get back. So, we went back to the office but I wasn't fine. Judy, my boss, had to help me walk into the office and as we entered the lobby a co-worker saw us and came to help, she took the other side. So I thought I was walking, with help but I was walking, then I looked down at my feet; I saw my left foot dragging on the floor and I couldn't feel it. I'm scared, what's happening, do I have a brain tumor, am I going to die? Judy called an ambulance and I went to the hospital. Since I wasn't bleeding or in pain I waited and waited. By the time I saw a doctor, it seemed I was fine, the doctor told me it was probably a peripheral neuropathy and that I should see my doctor the next day. I walked out of the hospital wearing my shoes, am I going crazy, what is going on, there is something wrong with me...but what?
The next day I woke up and I couldn't walk. OK, that's it! I'm either crazy or I have a brain tumor, there is something wrong...right? I couldn't stop thinking I'm not crazy, there's something seriously wrong!
My mom took me to see my doctor the next day, I told her what happened through a flood of tears. She looked at me and as if she could read my mind and said "you're not crazy, there is something wrong and we're going to find out what it is." I had an MRI that day, it was a Thursday. On Saturday my doctor called and she said "I got the results from your MRI, our office is closed today but I think you should come in and I think you should bring one of your parents." Oh no, she's going to tell me I have a brain tumor and I'm going to die! I'm not going to get to see my daughter grow up. I wonder how much time I have.
My mom was out so my dad came with me. My doctor sat us down and said "you have Multiple Sclerosis" and I said "am I going to die?" She kinda chuckled and said "not from MS." She went on to briefly describe MS, before that day I had never seen my Dad cry. I was filled with emotion, fear and relief at the same time, fear about what the future held, relief that I wasn't going to die. I was referred to a Neurologist, I saw him the following week.
My Neurologist explained in detail what MS is. MS is a chronic degenerative decease of the central nervous system and is the result of damage to the myelin sheath that surrounds our nerves. The myelin sheath protects our nerves and directs the signal that is being sent from the brain, it's function is similar to the plastic coating on electrical wire. When the sheath is damaged scar tissue develops, so when a signal passes through the damaged area the signal may not get through at all or the strength of the signal is diminished. The result is mild to severe muscular impairments, such as spasticity and/or weakness in one or more limbs, local sensory losses, bladder dysfunction, or visual disturbances or impairments.
Wow, ok, this is bad, what will happen next, what will my life look like now? These thoughts and more came flooding in, so I asked my neurologist if I was going to be able to run and play with my daughter, dance, jet ski, hike or any of the other things I enjoyed. He asked me "do you want to do those things?" I told him yes, yes I do! I have never forgotten what he told me next, he said "then do it, don't let this disease run your life, you should continue to do the things you enjoy, you run your life."
